And I'll Say of the Lord...

You are my Portion
My Deliverer
My Ever Present Help in Times of Need...

You've all heard of me, I would guess.  The story of the woman healed by Jesus from an issue of blood.  That's it in a nutshell, you know.  I was sick and He healed me.  He did that for a lot of people you know.  But, I am not a lot of people.  I'm just me.  And I want to tell you what I remember about that day.  Because, to me, it is unforgettable.

It's true that I had been sick for many years.  More years than I can remember, really.  My health had deteriorated to the point of no return.  I had been to all the experts to find a cure.  They took my money and sent me away the same way I came in - carrying my illness with me.  My illness had taken over my life.  It controlled my social life (I didn't have one).  It controlled my physical life. Bleeding for so long was literally killing me.  It would end it all for me, I figured, fairly soon.  It controlled my emotional life.  I had given up.  I was in despair.  What hope was there really, for any kind of healing?  The experts all agreed.  I was a hopeless case.  Some of them whispered that they thought I was "imbalanced".  Just a bit crazy.  I suppose that made it easier for them to write me off... 

The worst part of it all, though, was the shame.  I carried it everywhere with me.  I heard the whispers, even when there weren't any.  The voices of mockery and derision pumped through my heart as surely as did my blood.  I couldn't turn them off, I had listened to them all of my life. But, really, I knew they were true.  All I had ever heard was the voice of ridicule and shame. I know my illness was diagnosed as bleeding.  But, the bleeding on the inside was deeper and more killing than anything physical.  I was beginning to contemplate how I could end all of my pain...

Just as I began to make a plan of my own to "heal" me, once and for all, He came to town.  Isn't that strange that He showed up, just when I needed Him most?  You would almost have to say, He knew me...  

Anyway, there He was, on His way to heal someone's daughter.  He was known as the Healer.  I began to wonder if He really was.  Maybe He could...  I argued with myself, back and forth, first believing and hoping, than talking myself out of it as too much to hope for.  After all, I had been sick my entire life.  How could I expect Him to heal me, just like that?  In the end though, I felt something strange pulling me toward Him.  It felt like what I remembered from so long ago.  It felt like hope.  I don't know where it came from, except, maybe, from Him?  

Whatever, once I felt it, I couldn't contain myself.  I ran out the door and to the square where he was surrounded by people everywhere.  I wasn't supposed to be there.  I was "unclean".  I didn't want this holy man to see me or know that I was breaking the rules.  So I crept up on Him as quietly and inconspicuously as possible and just reached for the hem of his garment.  When I felt it touch my finger tips, everything changed instantly and I knew it.  I was healed!  I could barely contain myself. Everything changed!  I mean everything.  The bleeding, of course, stopped instantly.  But, even more than that, I heard His voice calling me to Him.  I saw Him look at me with those eyes that went right through me.  He knew me.  And He loved me.  I was transformed by His love for me.  I could hear His voice speaking His love to me over every other voice I had ever heard.  My heart exploded with His love.  Out of the fountain of His love, I was washed all over with crystal clear water that made me clean and alive as I had never been before.  Yes, I am that woman.  The one He healed.  The one He loves...

I want you to know, what He did for me, He will do for you.  Are you bleeding all over?  Have you been carrying your wounds around your whole life?  Have you given up?  Are you isolated and ashamed of who you are?  Jesus has come to be with you.  He wants to heal you.  He loves you.  He sees you.  He is able to do what all the experts can't.  He can wash you clean and give you the gift of life and life abundantly.  Reach out for the hem of His garment and be amazed at what He will do for you.  He has never lost sight of you. He sees you struggling.  He is strolling through town, just waiting for you to come.  What are you waiting for?  Run to Him.  He will catch you in His arms.  And you will never be the same...