Springs of Living Water...

gushing out of you...

When I was a little girl, my favorite aunt came to visit from New York.  There just wasn't much of anything that happened in my family that surpassed the excitement of a visit from my Aunt Helen. I could tell you a lot about her, but, one of the things I remember most about her visits was the time my mom and dad took her "downtown" to see what they considered to be one of the seven wonders of the world, right there in our own home town of Chicago!  After all, she lived in New York, and don't you know we were always trying to "one up" New York! 

As I remember it, we all piled into our old jalopy to drive downtown to see Buckingham Palace - I mean Buckingham Fountain!  I was quite young though, and I was sure we were going to see Buckingham Palace - right there in our very own Chicago!  Surely, New York didn't have anything that even came close to that!  Imagine my surprise when I discovered it was just a water fountain! Granted it was a rather spectacular water fountain, but, it was "just" a water fountain.  Water was squirting out miles high from many different portals, all bathed in multi-colored lights that made it even more lovely to watch.  I sat in silence trying in my little girl head to figure out how that water was squirting everywhere from some mysterious place within.  How does one make water flow like that?  What's the secret?!

That is one of the pictures I have when I think of what Jesus promised us in the scripture quoted above.  That is quite a promise.  If you have ever had the experience of running or hiking a long distance without readily available water, you know that feeling of being desperate for a drink.  Our bodies are made to be hydrated.  We can't go for long without the simple, God given gift of water.  I remember hiking a long distance, running out of water.  By the time I got home to refresh my body, I was physically shaking all over, becoming disoriented and almost too weak to turn the faucet to get the liquid that, to me, was now more precious than gold.  

The truth is, I have often been dry and desperately thirsty.  Grieving a loss of someone or something I love with all my heart, leaves me parched, weak, trembling and disoriented.  I struggle to know who I am in God's world.  Does He still care for me?  If He does, why is He doing this to me?  Doesn't He know how devastated I am by this loss?  Doesn't He know, I am lost without my loved one or the dream I have clung to for so long?  What is He doing to me?  Why is He doing it? Does He see me?  Does He see my broken heart?  Does He see I am D E V A S T A T E D?

This is grief pouring out of our hearts.  We are confused by it, disoriented by it, devastated by it, angry about our loss, struggling to pick up the pieces to even want to go on.  I believe it is important to pour out our hearts before God - tell Him everything we are feeling - He can handle it because He does so love us, He wants us to come to Him, not just with our highs, but when we are at the bottom of the pit, also.  He will meet us there.

The link I am including in this post is a short story of a young couple who went through the tragedy of losing their beautiful four year old daughter in a car accident - every parent's worst nightmare. The dad is a pastor.  It's so important to realize that, just because a man or a woman is following Christ, even in pastoral ministry, they are not exempt from the suffering of the rest of the human race.  This man tells his story honestly - his rage at God for taking his baby.  His wife tells her story of the pain she went through - in a different way, but, just as real.  We grieve differently, don't we?   And that is okay with God...

The story of their pain and their loss ends with the promise that He will make streams of Living Water flow out of us from within - He will turn our mourning into dancing - He will restore to us everything the enemy has stolen... In my own struggle with grief, that is not something I ever wanted to hear, and didn't always believe.  But, I offer this to you who are grieving whatever you have lost, because I have learned that He makes good on His promises.  They are not frivolous, empty words.  They are the promises of our Good and Faithful God.  

Tuck this promise of God in a corner of your heart and let Him work it down deep within your spirit.  Watch and see, He will make springs of living water flow out of that very same heart that is broken right now.  You are in my prayers, always.  May God, our loving and gracious Father, heal you through and through...

  

https://www.idisciple.org/makiah-king

In the Depths of His Love...

"He hideth my soul
in the depths of His love
and
covers me there with His hand..."
Hymn "He Hideth My Soul"
by Fanny Crosby

It is Easter weekend in the United States this week.  This picture poignantly portrays to me the loneliness of so many who have lost a loved one. When facing a holiday alone, it can feel like someone ripped open our wounds all over again and poured a bucket of vinegar all over them. There is a stinging, throbbing pain that surfaces when we least expect it.  It can feel like the world stopped spinning on its axis and nobody but us has noticed.  Grief can be very, very lonely.  People may avoid us, not knowing what to say.  If the loss is very new, we may still be in shock.  If the loss involved a spouse, we haven't even begun to figure out how we can make it without him or her. We may have been married for many years and now, suddenly, we find ourselves single again. How do I do that single thing after all these years?  I don't want it.  I didn't sign up for this...

Even after many years of living without a loved one, holidays spent with them, either good or bad, bring a rush of emotions that come with remembering the past.  We can feel lost, overwhelmed, unbearably lonely, and just want to run away.  I have been there.  I know it is extremely painful and not something we can talk to everybody about.  In fact, it can seem like people avoid us just wanting us to "get over it, already..." People are poor substitutes for God...

People may push us away, ignore us, pretend they don't see us.  They may reject us, avoid us, pressure us, be irritated with us, even sometimes laugh at us, partly because they can't handle the depth of our grief, or because they simply don't understand.  At times like this, it is so important to know what God has to say to us about who we are in His eyes, how much He cares for us, that He deeply, deeply understands our suffering and our loneliness.  He is a "man of sorrow, acquainted with our grief." Isaiah 53:3

This Easter, the world may seem to be dancing all around us, but, take stock of what is really going on in the world.  It is swinging wildly out of control all around us.  Do not be deceived by what appears to be a perpetual party.  We weren't made for that.  Especially at Easter, as we remember the unimaginable suffering and death of Jesus, we must chose to remember, in our own grief, that He is with us - He suffered and died an excruciating death to walk with us through it all.  The Resurrection of Jesus tells all of us who are wounded, grief struck and lonely that there is Hope. That He loves us more than we can possibly imagine.  He is holding on to you and me when we are overcome with grief and loneliness.  He is hiding you "in the depths of His love..." And the same hands that were pierced for us are covering us, protecting us, loving us, holding onto us.  He hasn't let go just because we're angry or depressed or cursing the world for our loss.  He is holding on to us and I don't believe He will ever let go.  You are more precious than diamonds, more beautiful than velvet, more treasured than gold. 

You are loved...